


Song and Dance

by Playing_In_The_Fast_Lane_Traffic



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-17
Updated: 2015-05-17
Packaged: 2018-03-31 00:37:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3957862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Playing_In_The_Fast_Lane_Traffic/pseuds/Playing_In_The_Fast_Lane_Traffic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>River wakes up in a strange house and she's totally confused about everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Song and Dance

**Author's Note:**

> [IF YOU LIKE MY WORK PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT OR KUDOS, THANKS]

She was in bed, somebody else's bed and she was warm, this much she knew for certain. A quick look under the covers confirmed she was nude. Where in the hell had she ended up? Who's bed was this? and why could she remember nothing from the previous night?. She glanced around the room, it looked as though she had been dropped into a quaint Victorian painting,very neat and tidy. The burning embers of a fire had turned to ash in the fireplace but the residual heat had filled the room with a comfortable yet sickly temperature. A cup of tea and a small saucer of biscuits had been set on the side table for her, the tea was now a lukewarm temperature, she guessed it had spent an hour at least in the room. She slowly picked up the cup after propping herself up in bed and took a small sip. A look of panic crossed her face momentarily as she scanned the room for the diary that her Doctor had given her, finally setting eyes on the navy blue book upon the floor beside the bed. After scanning it's contents to find out where exactly she was, she came to the conclusion that she had feared, there was no record of this place (she wrote down EVERYTHING). There was a tatty newspaper near the door, which she presumed somebody had slid under during her slumber. Picking it up, she checked the date: August 10th, 1890!. Suddenly footsteps were heard in the hallway outside, whoever lived in the house had come to check on her. She quickly made her way back into bed and faked sleep as a key turned in the lock. Somebody had entered, River turned to face them, the face she saw surprised her, it was Strax the Sontaran.  
"Strax?, it's you!" she exclaimed in surprise. "Yes, who did you expect? an enemy perhaps?, somebody to attack.." he began enthusiastically but was cut off by the scuffle of boots on the hallway floor, he turned to greet the new face. River didn't know who it was and had heard no voice to clue her in, however after a few mumbled replies from Strax, he turned on his heels, bid goodbye to River and walked after the silent being. River quickly realised she was still nude and covered herself more efficiently with the quilt.Before she had the chance to scope out her clothes, a new face had appeared in the empty doorway. This time a young woman dressed in what River knew to be a maid's outfit which was clearly from that era. "Mornin' ma'am" she said in a thick Cockney accent. She had an innocent demeanor and looked no threat to River. "Sorry to 'ave left ya without clothes ma'am but the mistress said not to wake you". She held out a pile of clothes, neatly folded. The woman entered the room and placed the clothes on the end of the bed. "Is there anything you require ma'am?, the mistress has a fully stocked pantry and it's no trouble to whip you up a fresh cup of tea". She awaited a reaction but had crossed back to the doorway and remained there. "No thank you, i'm fine" River said with an appreciative smile. The young woman began to turn as if to walk away, River interrupted her exit. "Actually.." she started. "Yes ma'am?" the woman turned back to face her. "What's your name?" River enquired. "Jenny ma'am, Jenny Flint" the woman smiled in reply. "Tell me Jenny, where exactly am I and who owns this beautiful house?" River didn't know what to expect in answer. "Well ma'am, I think once you are dressed, you should feel free to explore the house, maybe your questions would be better answered by the mistress". With that, she turned and quickly left, as if she didn't have the desire to be questioned further. River used the duvet to cover herself as she crossed the room to close the door, she returned the quilt to the bed before proceeding to get dressed. After dressing, she opened the bedroom door and checked both ways before stepping out. The corridors were decorated in a similar fashion as the bedroom had been, except there was the odd painting hanging on walls. The walls themselves where papered with an anaglypta design in a distinct black and white pairing. She decided to turn left and follow the sound of clinking porcelain, there must be a guest, or this would be the "mistress" whom Jenny had kept referring to.  
"Come in my dear" said a calm voice from inside the drawing room. River hadn't realised that since she had started on her train of thought just outside the bedroom, she had walked down the hallway, descended the stairs and now found herself about level with a closed door, behind which the voice had emminated from. Quite an accomplishment not to have received an injury on the way through the narrow halls. "Do come in Professor Song, I don't bite" insisted the bodiless voice from inside the room. There was a giggle from inside, which disconcerted River slightly. "Well? are you entering or what boy!?" Strax had appeared with a tray, upon which was a cup and saucer and a glass of red wine. He was tapping his foot with impatience. River entered the room so as not to cause any more delay in his routine.  
Upon entering the room, River could have mistaken it for a tropical greenhouse. There were ceiling high plants, it was much warmer in this room than in the rest of the house, it felt as though the intense heat from the sun was concentrated solely in this room. Since she wasn't sure where the voice had come from exactly, she opted to follow Strax. It felt as though they had been walking for a few minutes before they came across a veiled figure sat attentively on a high backed wicker chair, opposite an identical chair which was empty but had Jenny stood behind it. The veiled figure gestured for River to sit in the empty chair, she obliged but was wary of her surroundings. Who was this mysterious figure? and why the veil?. She had no time to ask these questions before a ringing at the front door had led to Strax leaving the room. River wasn't sure if she was better or worse off in his absence. "I trust you slept well?" the figure asked, River at last knew she was talking to a woman, but why was she so reluctant to show her face?. "Yes thank you, i'm appreciative of your hospitality", River replied. At this point, the woman reached up and removed her veil, revealing a face with the texture of a lizard's, green and scaly, however it seemed rather beautiful at the same time. The woman took hold of her glass and sipped her wine. River must have stared without realising, the woman looked curiously at her. "Does my appearance shock you Professor?" she asked. "Not at all, may I ask your name?" River enquired as Jenny shifted behind her, then made to answer but decided against it. "Of course, my name is Vastra, I am Homo-Reptilia. My siblings and I have slumbered under the earth's crust for millions of years." Smiled the woman in answer. "Lovely to meet you, sorry how do you prefer to be addressed?" asked River. "Madame Vastra, or simply Vastra will be quite adequate." Vastra said as she took another sip of her drink. Jenny moved to stand behind her. They looked at each other in a knowing way, Vastra looked back to River and continued. "Has Jenny introduced herself?" she quizzed. "Yes she has, she's a credit to you as your maid" replied River politely. Vastra smiled and touched Jenny's hand affectionately. "I'm glad to hear it, we have been married 2 years now. I'm never sure how people will react to us both." A gentle smile on both Vastra and Jenny's faces showed that they were more at ease with River. She still couldn't help feeling slightly confused, neither women had answered any of her questions.  
They had been chatting and drinking for a short while when Strax entered the room carrying a telephone, it was ringing as he handed it to Vastra, she put the receiver to her ear and answered. Since it was impossible to hear the other participant, Jenny and River only heard Vastra speak every now and again with "Yes", "I understand" and "I agree". After a few moments, she put the phone receiver back in it's cradle and told Strax "Thank you Strax, we will be expecting another two guests shortly", he turned and bowed as he left the room. Jenny was confused, as was River, "Who was that ma'am?" Jenny enquired. River looked at Vastra, waiting for the names of these mysterious newcomers. "That my dear, is a very old friend of mine, nothing to worry about." Both River and Vastra exchanged a look, they both took a sip of their drinks. Vastra looked at Jenny, "Would you mind giving us a moment alone my dear?" she said with a kind smile. "Of course not ma'am", Jenny curtseyed and left the room. "Madame!", Strax had managed to enter the room in the time it had taken for Jenny to leave. "There are two boys waiting in the drawing room for you, what attack formation do you wish to take? I recommend a full frontal assault using grenades and mimetic cluster mines.." Vastra was aware that Strax was getting too excited, "No Strax that won't be necessary, would you please send them in?"  
"Of course Madame." Strax bowed out the room mumbling about wasting a tactical advantage. All this time River had sat silently, enjoying the company, and the tea of course. Vastra turned her attention to the woman sat directly across from her, "I find you rather intriguing Doctor Song..." she took a small sip of her drink. "You are the first human I have met whom has not shown surprise at Strax's appearance, or my own for that matter, may I ask why?" she had an inquisitive tone to her voice which matched her facial expression. River took her time in replying, "Well let's just say i've met many species on my travels, dated a few too, i'm not entirely sure they were all male." she smiled at Vastra's expression as it turned to understanding. As they sat and finished their drinks, River asked the question which had been playing on her mind since she had seen it, "May I be so bold as to ask, is that wine you're drinking?" Vastra smiled as if she had been awaiting this question. "As you may know Doctor, there are few red liquids on this earth which may be consumed safely, red wine...and blood, this is not red wine." There was a satisfied smile that flashed across her face as she finished, assuming River would be shocked. Before River or Vastra had the chance to continue, both Strax and Jenny had entered accompanied by two new faces, a tall man wearing a fez and an old fashioned bow tie, his face looked familiar but River did not know why. She also recognised the woman with him, but again couldn't recall from where. The woman was almost as tall as the man, with ginger hair and a kind face. The man beamed at River as he saw her, "Hello Sweetie," he said with childlike excitement.  
"Sir, ma'am,would either of you like a drink?" Jenny asked the newcomers. River still looked puzzled as she tried to figure out who they were, while she was wondering, Vastra looked between them all with a calm look on her face. As though she was studying them. It was the woman that answered first, when she did, it was with a thick Scottish accent, "No thank you Jenny". The man's reply followed shortly, "Yes, I do quite fancy a cup of tea and maybe a Jammy Dodger if you have any. By the way Vastra, loving the decor!". She inclined her head in acknowledgment, he looked back at Jenny, who replied with "Of course, we 'ave 'em especially for your visits Sir". [Unfinished]


End file.
